Capt Cliff’s Weird Rants and Raves: A Parody on Applebees and American Capitalism

The Applebee’s restaurant chain says it’s changing the way it serves juice after a toddler was mistakenly given a small amount of alcohol at a Detroit-area franchise. Apparently, news of the slightly sedated toddler has struck a chord among exhausted young parents who are now lining up at local restaurants requesting similar drink orders for their hyperactive tykes. Applebee’s has responded with a new line of “kiddie cocktails”, including a Barney Bacardi and Coke, and a Shirley Temple Black Russian. After numerous complaints however, the Bacardi drink was changed to a rum beverage with a non carbonated fruit drink that is less likely to cause tooth decay. In related news, Disney has taken notice of the furor and is also considering adding a line of child oriented alcoholic beverages at the Magic Kingdom. The soon to be marketed drinks will feature completely inebriated Disney characters on Mardi Gras style sippy cups……..




About captaincliff

Psychologist by day, insomniac Pirate blogger by night, this Child of God likes to share sarcastic social commentary as well as topsy-turvy observations about life, love and the pursuit of zaniness, a functional form of insanity in an increasingly insane world
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