If I’m Not a Kangaroo………

If I’m Not a Kangaroo Why do I have a Male FUPA?

FUPA is “Fat Upper Pubic Area”. I looked it up in the Urban Dictionary. I’ve noticed for awhile now, well, especially since I lost weight (about 15 lbs.) that certain parts of my body refuse to shrink in accordance with other adjacent body parts. I thought I read somewhere that the human body is an intricate network of specialized cells and organs in constant communication. Why did my shrunken face and skinny “chicken” legs NOT tell my upper pubic area or FUPA to lose the same amount of mass and circumference? I remember the first time I noticed myself having anything FUPA-like. I believe it was around ten years ago and I assumed it was due to the Medium sized Mellow Mushroom pizza with five toppings and extra cheese I had inhaled whole (and practically unsliced) after smoking a bowl of pot. I used to actually enjoy smoking a little marijuana when I was younger. Now it seems to only act as an anti-nausea aid after having consumed every carbohydrate containing product in my kitchen pantry. The term “munchies” does not begin to explain the intensity of the food cravings that follow my limited late in life marijuana use. In fact, I think I begin to feel hungry before the pipe has even touched my lips. Is there such a thing as second hand cravings? I realize that the intensity and duration of my post pot desires for “sweet and salty” are not normal, particularly because my ravenous hunger never really diminishes once I get high. I just finish eating everything calorie-laden in my house and then collapse into a fetal position while still considering what I could “really go for”. What’s my point? My point is that smoking weed is no longer advisable at my age. They say that THC the active ingredient in marijuana settles into the fat cells of the body and stays there for several weeks. In my case I think it has settled into my FUPA for the duration. I’m glad I lost some weight and lowered my cholesterol but if I’m not a kangaroo, why do I have or need a FUPA?

About captaincliff

Psychologist by day, insomniac Pirate blogger by night, this Child of God likes to share sarcastic social commentary as well as topsy-turvy observations about life, love and the pursuit of zaniness, a functional form of insanity in an increasingly insane world
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