Finally, after many years of disappointment and high expectations thanks to sci-fi movies like Total Recall, Blade Runner, and Spielberg’s brilliant film, Artificial Intelligence (AI), there is a Facebook app and Zynga.com inspired social “game” that is an approximation of virtual sex. I say approximation because in the game called The Ville (yeah, as in Farmville) it STILL looks to me like lego characters who get to go to the “advanced level” allowing them to shed their clothes and hop into a bed and “do it”. From what I read the actual sex act is concealed under a blanket of hearts or rose petals or some such animated fig leaf. That means, essentially and especially to us guys, that we are back to square one. As far as we’re concerned, we see more realistic whoopee in movies like Team America:World Police in which the puppets copulate.
Let’s face it gentlemen, most of us have since our childhoods in the 50’s or 60’s dreamed of only two or three technological innovations: space travel that somehow involves sex, the microwave oven, and virtual sex without emotional, financial or romantic “strings” attached. It is a sad commentary that today in Stardate 2012 we only have one of the three basic Man-dreams fulfilled. I do admit that the first time my high school girlfriend, Ellen Friedman cooked a large barbecued beef rib in a futuristic microwave in 1970 (her dad sold them) I did feel something like love in my heart and a noticeable sensation in my stomach that signaled a new era in male-female relations and gastronomy. However, such a brave new world that would finally include the following: 1) sex in space 2) sex with life-like robots (who always tell us how great we are) and 3) pornographic holograms in which we can engage in multi-dimensional sex with attractive alien species has turned out to be one big black hole of nada-nothing. The whole Farmville, Simville, buy and sell marital bliss and feathering of ones “domestic nest” version of virtual existence is well, a pale imitation of what we already have…..and would like to escape via a rocket ship with warp drive, a transporter or the Enterprise holodeck where anything is possible, like sex without puppet strings and barbecued ribs without calories or cholesterol.