Ok, I’ve got the working title but not yet the full description of my self-promotion campaign and global marketing blitz. What does Facebook mean by the sub-title “Notes About Me”??? Is this like a eulogy in advance? The beauty of this section of Facebook is its total anonymity, since the chance of someone reading this part of the page or stumbling across this entry while surfing the Internet is equivalent to being struck by lightning while urinating on a toaster. Dont ask me how I came up with that analogy….I just did. Also keep in mind that the average attention span of people under 30 years old is one nanosecond. People between 30 and 50 years old are usually busy working, burping babies, coaching Little League or feverishly trying to balance their dwindling bank accounts. Ironically most of us over 50 years old are trying to remember what we were just talking about, why we walked into a certain room, or awkwardly pretending to recognize their neighbors first names when they wave at us in the car or while walking the dog. I have a sneaking suspicion we ALL have progressive Alzheimers including the doctors we go to see about our declining cognitive functioning.
Let’s face it. We’re all on some Ronald Reaganesque Disney-ride to Dementiaville… with a quick bathroom break in Tomorrowland. Maybe that’s not so bad. There are plenty things I would rather forget, including most of the 80s, the cell phone crotch shot of Anthony Weiner and especially that Disney song the robotic tropical birds sing “In the Tiki Room”. I’ve had that stuck in my head since 1972. Translation: NEVER take LSD and go to Disneyland thinking it might improve ones “total experience”…..yeah right.
I Dare You to Listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxJ4PQVLszY