Have you ever watched something on You Tube or Tosh 2.0 or even Cops and suddenly had an old song pop into your head like a fitting soundtrack? What is this strange auditory phenomena? Are we all latent DJs or mixtape impressarios simply in need of the right stimulus to turn us into Moby like talent? Even weirder, at least for me, the more outlandish or “hick” the video… the better. For example I was watching (for the hundredth time) a You Tube fight between competing families of white trailer park trash somewhere in Florida which immediately brought to mind the need for: 1) better contraception 2) higher and lower education and 3) a lobotomy lottery for certain selective groups of people. In this fascinating cell phone video which could easily play as a documentary on the National Geographic Channel (for its stark portrayal of lower primate behavior involving social kinship groups and heehaw display rituals) we see and hear how people talk to each other and resolve their differences when nobody has a frontal lobe to speak of. In the background we hear a woman continuing to call out the name of some central character in the altercation named Ricky. The combination of her unique inflection and linguistic preference (for Appalachian dialect) creates an entrancing display…. of hopeless stupidity. So where does the music come in? Right there. That’s when I suddenly started to hear a haunting combination of 70’s rock and one hit wonders to accompany the drama. First I heard Steely Dan’s Rikki Dont Lose that Number (“I heard Your leavin’…that’s ok. I thought our wild time had just begun……”). Then more mysterious yet,  I suddenly remembered Paper Lace’s, Billy Dont Be a Hero (“Billy dont be a hero, dont be a fool with your life…”). Let’s face it, while I always liked Steely Dan, neither of these songs are on the top ten hits list in my mental jukebox or living room CD collection. I can only conclude that my inner DJ and psychic lyricist was appealing for Ricky the ponytailed caucasian dude to take the high road, look around and consider his options. I dont expect him to schedule a Pilates session, sign up for a series of yoga classes or read the latest book on mindful meditation. I just think he is surrounded by a lot of dumb and dumber and he might want to use foresight rather than hindsight to make things better for himself and for the dirty little kids that are standing there on their bikes watching everybody else, including the predominantly big boned women pummeling each other like sumo wrestlers in cut-offs. Ricky, dont be a hero but do stop modeling stupid and keep that phone number while your at it. I realize it’s probably your probation officer or somebody from DSS, but you might just need it bro.