Author Archives: captaincliff

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About captaincliff

Psychologist by day, insomniac Pirate blogger by night, this Child of God likes to share sarcastic social commentary as well as topsy-turvy observations about life, love and the pursuit of zaniness, a functional form of insanity in an increasingly insane world

Australians, The Honey Badger of Human Beings

Posted on March 16, 2012 by captaincliff

Australians, The Honey Badger of Human Beings by Cliff Mazer  on Thursday, March 15, 2012 at 11:09pm · Simply put, this essay is one mans attempt to praise those plucky Australians, otherwise known as Aussies. They are without doubt the … Continue reading →

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Listen to the Music: In My Head

Posted on March 13, 2012 by captaincliff

Listen to the Music: In My Head by Cliff Mazer  on Tuesday, March 13, 2012 at 12:27pm · Have you ever watched something on You Tube or Tosh 2.0 or even Cops and suddenly had an old song pop into … Continue reading →

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CaptCliff on Bestiality: Hello Sodom, Hello Gomorrah

Posted on March 11, 2012 by captaincliff

CaptCliff on Bestiality: Hello Sodom, Hello Gomorrah Once again there appears to be a rash of bestiality in the news. We need to remain calm, thoughtful and optimistic in the face of such, well, inhumane acts. In the case of … Continue reading →

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CaptCliff The Closet Narcissist

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

What would you do if you happened to have an identical twin that you didnt particularly like and had trouble getting along with? How about if you were one of two conjoined (siamese) twins who had completely different tastes, preferences … Continue reading →

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Getting Ready for My High School Reunion: Food For Thought

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

Recently I remembered that I had signed up to go to my 40th high school reunion in Highland Park, Illinois in less then a month. As a Clinical Psychologist I am often called on to represent reality and constructive thinking … Continue reading →

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My Writing

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

Given my personality, I kinda wish I could go quietly into that good nite. It would certainly mitigate alot of the drama.  I would have written more but it took me the first 10 minutes to find the little box … Continue reading →

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CaptCliff on the Latest News: Gaddafi’s Corpse to Go on World Tour

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

Widespread interest in the dead body of Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi has lead to a entrepreneurial bidding war for his corpse. Several large publicly held companies and multi-national corporations including Sony, Samsung, Westinghouse, Amana, Coca Cola, and Frigidaire have submitted … Continue reading →

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Death video of Geraldo..or Gaddafi..or both

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

Death video of Geraldo..or Gaddafi..or both

 

In a tragic case of mistaken identity, Geraldo Rivera was shot to death today by Libyan rebels who mistook him for the deranged dictator Muammar Gaddafi. Rivera was said to have died shortly after rebel fighters overran loyalists defending the coastal town of Sirte – finally ending the last remnants of Gaddafi’s 42 year hold on Libya.

 

Libyan National Transitional Council official Abdel Mlegta said ” I swear the guy looked just like Gaddafi!! He even had the same bad hair…We’re really sorry.” The celebrity reporter was wounded in both legs at dawn today as he attempted to relieve himself in a drainage pipe right next to the cowering strongman who had fled in a heavily armed convoy which NATO warplanes attacked.

 

“I swear to Allah we couldnt tell who was who” the official said. “There was a lot of firing against his group and he just wouldn’t stop talking so we shot him. Neither of them made any sense.” The rebels later recaptured the real Libyan leader and executed him after beating him with shoes as is their national custom.

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Capt Cliff blogs on his Birthday: Kudos for Cutlery

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

Letter to my Wonderful and Crazy cousin Donna: Donna, thanks so much for the beautiful knife set from Macy’s. I feel like Jack the Ripper on his birthday. Do you think Jack’s family and everyone (who really knew him) got … Continue reading →

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Good Morning Casey…and Hannibal Lector too

Posted on March 8, 2012 by captaincliff

At the risk of sounding terminally bored or possibly hypomanic (ok, it is 5:00AM, and I clearly woke up way too early) do u ever wonder what Casey Anthony is doing right now? Ever try to get into her head … Continue reading →

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